Son of a Lich
by RighteousDarkness
Summary: this story really hurts my eyes but i don't have the heart to delete it so yeah
1. The Only One

**Author's Note!**

Aww yeaa...Finnceline. : D Just a fair warning: Some scenes will be hard to write…IF you know what I mean….; P

But I'll try my best; just don't expect any M rated material.

Anytime soon anyway.

Finn's still 13, I'm probably not going to age him 18 or something. Most spelling and or grammar mistakes are intentional, since I want to stick to Finn's or other characters' radical styles. Oh, and since I feel like I have to: I don't own Adventure Time {sadly}. No matter how radical it would be, it belongs to Pendleton Ward, etc. This is my first fanfic, so hope you guys like it. But anyway enough stalling and on with der story… 

**Prologue: **

Right now, it was life or death. I could hear the princesses' shrieks even from where I was standing. _Calm down_, I thought, _it'll be just like last time, you just need to defeat him with the power of liking-someone-a-lot…_ But I knew he wouldn't go down so easily now. I heard my own ragged breaths as I put my hands on my knees. The low, grumbling whisper of the Lich's voice in my ear as he told me the exact same words he had said when he was leading me to my doom, not so long ago.

"_Aren't you cold…. Finn?"_

**Chapter 1: **_**Finn (much earlier)**_

__This was bunk.

I was draped across the couch in our treehouse, with absolu-nothing to do besides listen to Jake playing _Guardians of Sunshine_ on Beemo (and still failing). I took in the really strong scent of Tree Trunks's fresh apples from an earlier pranking session with Jake and NEPTR as I went over my mental check list:

Sparring? Check.

Saved some princesses (yet again)? Check.

Punched Ice King in the gut? Nah, that old coot was just working on that fan fiction he was writing about me and my bro. I mean, really, Fionna and Cake? Creepy.

How about hangin' with Peebles? I sighed. No, she was working on some super- sciencey junk. Somethin about reversing the polarity of science, science, science. Lately she had just been locked inside her lab doing Lincoln-knows-what. So no. After I hear the sound of Jake in the middle of the room losing for like the kajillionth time, I asked, "Jake why the _math_ don't you give up already? Look you've wasted Beemo all up!"

"No way man, I almost got to the second level! " He says, without even looking away from Beemo's dimming screen.

"Finn is right, Jake," BMO said in its cute but weird accent, "I am in critical low battery! You must turn me off!" I grinned.

"Beemo, I think Jake just wants you _turned on." _I say. Suddenly a giant orange fist flicks me in the buns from where I was lying on the couch face-first on the circular carpet. _Ouch._ By instinct I flip back up quickly, with my hand on the hilt of my sword ready to kick monster butt. And then I look down and see Jake's emotionless face creepily lit up by Beemo's screen.

"What the hey-hey Jake!" He turns his face upwards after his character dies at Hunny Bunny.

"Dude, don't say things like that! Where the math did you get that from anyways?!"

"Yeesh, I just said you wanted Beemo turned on..." I muttered. _What was wrong with that guy today…_ Jake was about to laugh his pixie pants off and then he caught himself. "Whatever, dude, imma go take a nap. Stupid Sleepy Sam…" He slingshots himself up to our room, and as his stretchy self passes me I heard him say "WHAMP!" and lets out a huge fart. And I had my mouth open.

"Aw, sick dude! Why can't you ever use your powers WITHOUT letting out your butt cologne?" I said sarcastically to the ceiling, while waving away the air in front of me. I heard Jake's booming laughter. I remember my bro telling me the story of how he kept trying to rescue me when I was kidnapped by those weird yellow goblins, and how he had passed out at his own joke with some water nymph ladies. I frowned. _Yeah, Jake, laugh till you realize what a butt you are, _I thought._ But you're MY butt_. Wait, never mind. That just sounds weird.

MENTAL NOTE: Ask Jake what sexy pole-dancing is.

Ugh, I needed water. I carefully put my sword in the corner of the room; sure I wasn't gonna use it where I was going. I decided to go to the little pond near our house where me and Jake fed those ducks. I did a triple flip out the window and landed on the little pillow (hehe, that rhymes) I laid out just in case Jake ever temporarily lost his powers again. Unlikely, but ya never know what kinda crazy witches might be lurking around Ooo. I turned from the treehouse and began to walk on the path cutting in the middle of the forest. **(3****rd**** person POV)**The sun was already going to set. Shades of blood red and purple surrounded the sun, illuminating the rows of endless trees and clouds in the Land of Ooo… It was a wonderful sight, one that would conclude the last peaceful day…**(Back to Finn)** I looked up to the clouds and sighed. This sunset was probably one of a kind, it was so flippin' beautiful.

_Like me._

Well, the one of a kind part anyway. Susan had run away with the rest of the frickin fish people tribe, so I had no way of knowing if she was human, much less ask her about what happened to my people. How was it possible, after thirteen years, no one's EVER told me anything about, well…me? How was it possible the other humans just…disappeared?! Did I have no real, living, _human _parents out there? Sure, I loved Ma and Dad, _Jake's_ parents, but….I felt something.._.__**MISSING**_**.** I slammed my fist against one of the trees next to me, making some of the leaves fall to the ground, the bark chipped, and my fist throb. _Oh no, oh no_. I quickly turned back and gave it a quick kiss. I was seriously getting thirstier. I began to jog, "SORRY, TREE!" I yelled back. _Okay Finn,_ I thought, _that's enough soul-searchiness for one day…_I slowly stopped, seeing that the sky was darkening and I was stepping on candy cobblestone. I directed my gaze to what lay in front of yhe path. _The Candy Kingdom. _It looked pretty rad at night; the lights making it look like an amuse-y park I saw in one of several old books Jake had stuffed under the floor planks.

_I wonder what PB'S doing._ _Is she still working on that…_ _pssh, what's the use_, I thought as I lifted up some of the candy sidewalk and sucked on it, _she's probably gonna have Peppermint Butler "escort" me out again_… I slumped. I didn't feel like going to the pond anymore. I turned my body away from the tempting (and delicious) Candy Kingdom and went back the way I came from, beginning with the rustling, growling bushes. Wait,_ GROWLING bushes..? _ I smiled._ Heh, no problem I'll just take my sword out and see what the lump is the_-and then it hits me. _I left my sword at home. _ All I saw was a blur of an ugly black thing and I crashed to the ground. I use a headlock (thanks to Donny) and flipped the creature thing over so that I'm on top of it, but still it struggles. I raise my fist ready to KO and the monster starts…laughing? It slowly morphs into that pale face I've seen so much lately. "Marceline." I meant to say her name in surprise but it came out in a whisper. We stay like that for a few awkward seconds, me wide-eyed and her eyes in a bored expression. She smirked.

"So you gonna get off of me or what?"I barely noticed my hands were on either side of her body.

"Oh, uh, right…" I rolled off to the side and flipped back up. I felt my face flush. _Why do I act so weird around her …_ Marceline just floated over and sat in the branch of a tree, so she was facing me. (Another rhyme?)

"So, uh, what'r you doing so close to the Candy Kingdom? I thought you and PB were like enemies or something..." I said, trying to make conversation. She blew a strand of her hair out of her eyes. "Nah, Bonnie's too sweet and sugary to be my enemy…but y'know, I was hungry, so I was seeing if Peppermint Butler was around…" O_h no, not Peppermint! Wait, she's just messing with my head…right? _ I guess she must have seen my horrified face, so she cackled. " Finn, you're totally predictable."I leaned against the tree she was sitting on. She laughed again. She took an apple next to her, sucked the red, and lightly threw it to my head. She bared her fangs. "So, why do you look so …down in the dumps?" she asked.

"Nothing. Nothing." I muttered, avoiding her gaze. _PB. Everything._ But of course I'm not going to talk about my probs to anyone anytime soon. She flew down and touched my shoulder. It sent weird chills up my arm. Seeing my uncomfortable-ness, she pulled her hand away and put a lock of hair behind her ear. "Well, whenever you need to talk, you know where to find me..." She transformed into her bat form and quickly flapped away. I watched her until she was just a dark dot in the distance.

**All right! First chapter done!**

**I know yesterday's episode said Susan was a human but I was typing this Sunday so forget that episode with this. I'll try to update as soon as I can, so check back every week or two. I don't have internet at my house so I'll see what I can do. (Damn, I keep rhyming… you can never watch Adventure Time too much…) Thanks 4 reading. : ) **

**Finn: "it calls me forth!"  
>Jake: "No it's probably just puberty calling…"<br>**


	2. A Hatless Dream

**A/N!**

OH MY GLOB! I was so flippin' happy all of my reviews were good, no negative comments. :D as my first fanfiction/story EVER, it's quite an accomplishment for me. :D Oh and whoever said they were gonna kill me if I didn't write this (xD) thank you for your…enthusiasm. Glad someone likes this story that much. Anyway, I'll incorporate another POV for this chapter, last chapter I just wanted to focus on Finn. And for those of you Finnceline uber-fans, do not fret, their moment will come, soon enough. ;)

_**Finn **_

I was in a room. It was cold. I didn't have my awesome hat. And I was defenseless. _ Again. _

Every time the two doors in front of me would open. And every time I would pick the left one. Which led to my worst nightmare: an apocalyptic Ooo. But mostly I would see my people as slaves. And I would run up to them, pulling on their arm, shouting, "Please, come with me! I'm trying to save you, man!" or WO-man in other cases. But every time they would shake their dirt-filled heads and keep on carrying their chains. And a deep voice would say " _I'm coming for you.." _Which would make me wanna kick whoever said that in the buns. But I didn't have my awesome hat. And I had no sword.

So I ran.

I would run as fast as I could, but time slowed down, and at a snap of the fingers I would be chained too. But this time I didn't choose the left one. I entered the right one. But there was nothing there. Suddenly my imagination man ( the annoying one with the lute suit) came out of nowhere with his head down and something white in his hand. _My awesome hat._ Did he still remember about the whole imagination zone thing..? 

"Hey, uh, sorry about making you land in that-" I started, but seeing as he cocked his head, I guessed he didn't remember. Wait, how can he even remember, he's part of my brain! (Unfortunately)

" Uh, can I have m-" Imagination Man guy leapt backward and started falling down. _What the hey? "_COME BACK HERE, YOU TURD!" I shouted. I jumped after him_, _my blondish hair getting in my eyes- one of the main reasons I wear my hat in the first place-and landed on some kind of floor, but of course it didn't hurt. I slowly stood up, my fists clenched at my sides. I.M Guy was sitting cross-legged, his head down and my hat in his lap.

"Dude, seriously… gimme back my hat." He looked up. Which was when I realized he wasn't my Imagination Man. He was some sort of sick (in a bad way) cross between I.M and a skeleton zombie. His head twisted all the way around with a sickening crunch and he grinned, showing his sharp teeth. I began to back away, but he just got closer. "Don't you want your hat…Finn?" his voice morphed from the usual dorky, squeaky accent to a deep, grumbling one. I stumbled down to the floor, now crawling backwards.

"Finn…..Finn…Finn….FINN…FINN!"

I snapped open my eyes ready to lunge at whoever the math was gonna attack me when I saw Jake by the bed with a worried expression. "Dude, I've been trying to wake you up for like, 20 minutes! What the heck were you yellin about?" I got out of my sleeping bag and sat up. Jake just stared at me with a blank expression.

"…Finn?"

"Yeah, Jake?"

"I will never get used to your hair, man." My hands instantly went at my head, trying to cover it as much as possible. I went under the sheets, grabbed my hat from the floor and quickly put it on. _So much for that being a dream… _But there was just something odd, like someone was _giving_ me these dreams_, _it was just so whacked out_. I wonder who that mysterious person could be…_All of a sudden, I heard a growl from somewhere .Right. My stomach. _Grod,_ I was hungry. Jake laughed.

"Come on homie, let's go eat some breakfast." I hopped, still in my pajamas, on Jake's backas he stretched from our room to the kitchen. I raised my fist, "Onward!" I shouted. Jake landed on the kitchen carpet and I sat down in my chair next to Beemo. Jake grabbed some pancake mix.I was just about to get a plate whenI heard knocking at the door. I stood up and groaned. "Come on, Jake, let's go see who's there…."

"NO." Jake crossed his arms and stretched over to a chair, where he sat determined to stay.

"Jake..." I warned, "You know it's wrong-teous to ignore a guest..."

"But what if it's that coot Ice King?"

"Dude, it's not gonna be Ice King, if it was him, he'd be yelling about trying to kill us or his loneliness. That butt…" I smiled and shook my head.

"But I'm hungry…." He held out his gut right in my face. "See this, Finn? It's a hungry_ monster_. If you deny it pancakes, it will seek revenge on you. And you know what that revenge is? Poots. And not on newts…." He deepened his voice. "On your _**face**_…" I cringed. He must've been starving. "Wouldn't that be your butt?" I asked, trying to calm him down. Jake put a finger on his jowls in thought.

"Oh yeah! Hold up." He reached backwards, and I instinctively turned around. "Let's just go answer the frickin door.." I leaped down the wobbly ladder and ran to open the still knocking door, and looked down to a nicely dressed peppermint.

"Hello, Master Finn."

I smiled_. _ "Hey, Peppermint, what brings you here?" Jake was barely dragging his feet to my side, angry. "I have an important message from Princess Bubblegum!" Peppermint Butler handed me a pink envelope with an even pinker seal. I carefully opened the front of it, which was made of (you guessed it) pink chocolate. I lowered the letter so Jake could read it too.

_Dear Finn,_

_Good morning Hero! I have made a momentous scientific discovery. I cannot give much _

_detail in this letter but come to the Candy Kingdom as soon as you can. I have sent Peppermint _

_Butler to escort you, as he is the only one who knows of my laboratory location. See you soon!_

_ Yours,_

_Der Princess _

"Uh….Ok..." I said. The letter seemed like an excuse from the Princess for ignoring me all this time, like everything was forgotten just because of some _science _discovery. But an invitation is an invitation, and it'd be rude to ignore one…

"Master Finn, you should probably change out of your, er, sleepwear before we depart." Peppermint said cheerily. I looked at my red pajamas and laughed.

"Right…"

_**Jake**_

I… WAS….. HUNGRY. It was bad enough we had to answer Peppermint Butler, now we have to go to the CANDY KINGDOM? I might go all coco nuts hungry and eat Cinnamon Bun! Although he _would _taste frickin' delicious…AARGH! And to top it all off, I had Peppermint Butler right in front of me, giving off his minty odor. Hmm…. I haven't tasted a mint in a long time. Finn- don't know if luckily or unfortunately- came back in his usual blue outerwear and backpack with his sword in his hand. "Come on let's go!" he said.

It was pretty much an awkward silence until Peppermint Butler said something really disturbing.

"Master Finn, Master Jake?"

I answered for Finn. "Yeah, Peppermint Butler?" PB number two turned his…_delicious_…face towards us. "Do you boys remember that little ….deal we had when I allowed you passage to the Land of the Dead..?"

"Yeah…"me and my bro said at the same time. I tuned out the conversation, cuz I just had to think of something that would distract me from eating Peppermint Butler. Hmmm….oh yeah! Finn's hair. Whoa, that totally freaked me out when that tree witch wanted some hair. It's like, WOW did he really have it like that? How did he even manage to put it in his little hat he always wants to wear? But I saw the candy cobblestone. The delicious candy…**my sweet baby**…I ran to it.

_**Finn**_

"Yeah, I remember..." I said with caution to Peppermint. I don't know why candy people are so obsessers over flesh. I could still remember his haunting words. "_I'm going to take it from you while you sleep!"_ "Why the sudden question?" I asked. PB number 2 smiled. "Oh, nothing. I just wanted to make sure you remembered, that's all…" he stared at my arm, which I quickly moved to my backpack strap in a quick gesture. I looked at Jake. He must have been in some whacked out trance, he was just staring ahead. He suddenly stretched out and ripped out a huge chunk of the candy cobblestone and swallowed it in one bite. _Whoa._ Peppermint Butler gasped. Of course, he must have seen Jake!

"Sorry, Peppermint Butler," I explained, "Jake's like in a whacked out hunger-"

"No, Finn," Peppermint Butler interrupted with a horrified face, "LOOKS!" He pointed towards the Candy Kingdom. Black smoke was rising….It was covered in fire.


	3. FIRE!

**GREETINGS ADVENTURE TIME FANS (OR BORED PEOPLE) OF EARTH! (I'm frickin crazier than usual today 0_o) so where were we….oh, yeah! Candy Kingdom on FIRE…. Oh and Neverthrive: Yes" spontaneous combustion" IS a beautiful phrase although that's not exactly the case here….. And well it was a dream sequence, sent b-…you know what? Imma make you WAIT. I make you ALL wait! Hehe…HEHE…MUAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! *Finn enters room* "Hey, I'm ready to do the disclai- *sees me continuing evil laugh* ….*slowly backs out of the room* **

**Let this be a delicacy to your eye juices….. in other words: enjoy~  
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**Chapter 3: Of Fire and Evil**

_**Jake**_

Mmmm….heaven….delicious….. dang, who knew candy cobblestone was this delicious! My gut monster was very satisfied. Looks like I don't need to poot on Finn anymore. Hehe. I was gonna yell at Finn to come taste this too when I heard a gasp. I looked up. Oh, I think Peppermint saw me. Oh, glob, He's pointing at me! AAAAAAAHHHH! I was about to open my candy-filled mouth and apologize (Man, I don't wanna lose my flesh!) until Finn pointed at me too and yelled "LOOK!" Oh, they're pointing to the Candy Kingdom! I sniffed the air with mah super dog smell and smelled burnt marshmallows. Oh, a campfire, awesome! I slowly looked behind me to see what-HOLY STUFF THE CANDY KINGDOM'S ON FIRE!

_**Finn**_

OH…MY….GROD. When Peppermint first mentioned it, it was just the east side that was lit up, now it was slowly spreading to Bubblegum's castle. The flames switched colors between red and orange and black. Probably caused by someone with magical powers, maybe? "JAKE!" I called out. He was still gawking at the flames, his mouth filled with chewed up candy. _Uhh…._I ran to Jake and quickly hopped on his back. I looked back. "Peppermint?" Peppermint Butler was still pointing at the Candy Kingdom, his mouth open, paralyzed with fear.

"Uh, stay here…" I said. He said nothing_. I really hope he doesn't blow up like Starchy… _"Let's go dude!" I told Jake. He began to run and stretch to the Candy Kingdom at the same time, and as we got closer, I could hear the candy people's high pitched screams seeming to come from everywhere. We stopped in front of the castle.

"Dude, where's Bubblegum?" Jake asked between breaths. I took out my sword. "I don't-"Suddenly I heard the loudest scream coming from above. I looked up. "PRINCESS!" I yelled. PB was at the edge of the balcony, both of her hands holding out a chair in defense, the legs broken and dangling. She turned around and looked down and I saw her eyes were wide and her lab coat was covered in soot.

"Oh, Finn," she took a heavy breath, "thank goodness you're here, the L-" Suddenly a bony cloaked hand grabbed her from behind and she yelled out "HELP!" _Who the math IS that? _ I thought, _…hmmm…Well, whoever it is they're gonna get a sock in the nose!_

"Jake, stretch onto that balcony thing!" I yelled out, my voice barely heard over all the Candy Kingdom screaming. "Okay, man!" He yelled back. I held onto him tightly as he went directly up but he was deflected by what I could see only as a black dome around the balcony. We fell to the sugary ground face-first, my sword clanking with the impact. I flipped back up and grabbed my sword from the floor.

"Dude, it's guarded by magical wards! We're not gonna get there in time!" Jake shouted. I gritted my teeth. "Then we'll have to go in the old fashioned way!" Jake turned his hand into a morning-star and smashed the candy gates open. We entered, and a blast of heat hit my face.

"Whoa, it's like lava man heat in here!" I said to Jake. There were small piles of fire everywhere, slowly melting the candy and lighting up the place orange. Jake chuckled, "You should know…" he muttered. I sprinted up the stairs, careful to avoid the piles of fire, which Jake put out with his stretchy giant foot, and bumped into Dr. Ice Cream. She suddenly grabbed me by the shoulders, stopping me in my tracks. _What the hey..?_ Her …._hair_ was melting and messy and she looked like she might go out any moment. "Finn….Princess Bubblegum experiment…..go wrong….you have…t be careful…L-" her eyes rolled back and she fell against me, her ice cream getting all over my shirt. _Great… _I handed her to Jake.

"Jake, go take Cream outside, I'll go see what's goin on with PB!"

"Dude, I'm not leavin' you alone, you saw that whacked-out hand!"

"Just go! I'll be fine! Look, she's already melting!" A puddle of chocolate was spreading around our feet. Jake had a worried look.

"Be careful, Finn," he muttered, and then he ran back to the gate, the doctor in his hands. I began to cough. _Grod, it smells WAY worse than Jake's poots…. _ I held up the rim of my hat to my nose, ninja-style, and ran up to where the turret entrance was. I put my hand on the doorknob and turned it until a searing pain took hold of my hand. "AH!" I yelped. _Ugh, it's too hot. Looks like I'll have to kick it open. _But before I could do anything, the door creaked opened by itself. _Huh. Cool. _The room lacked light and the temperature dropped drastically. I entered cautiously and readied my sword to fight, but it flew out of my hand. My eyes widened as I saw two hands lit up with green flames, illuminating a bony face.

"Why, it's_ Finn_ the Human TOY…"

_**Lich**_

So the boy's come back to save the little princess here. How quaint. I was just about to leave, but there's no pain in defeating yet another failed hero. I waved my hand, and the human's little toy knife flew out of his hand. "Why, it's Finn the Human toy..." I said menacingly. WHY I didn't kill him right now? Well, I just didn't want to ruin the…. _fun. _I had already trapped dear Bubblegum in one of my deflector spells, now to deal with the weakling.

"LICH!" The boy exclaimed. This was going to be _very_ amusing indeed….

_**Finn**_

_The Lich! _He was floating about 10 feet away, an aura of black flames around him despite his kinda large size. Princess Bubblegum was unconscious in a weird bubble thing, probably of his doing._ "_Did you really think you had gotten rid of me so easily…Finn? Your little sweater may have damaged me, but it gave me all the more reason to come back…" _Keep talking_… I just stood there, waiting for something to happen, partly because I knew I was completely helpless, and the other for a distraction. "Aren't you going to congratulate me boy? I'm going to be a_ father_ soon…" _WHAT?! Then why did he have… PB? Wait..He's going to…have a kid with…__**BUBBLEGUM?!**_

"Oh no, human, not with dear Bonnibel, but your reaction was quite priceless…let's just say Bubblegum will be…a _snack_." _No…_ I clenched, _what kind of sick, twisted…aargh...I'LL KILL YOU LICH!_

"_**NEVER!"**_ I ripped out my sword from the wall, turned it so the blade was pointing down, and jumped on top of the Lich, but was deflected by his black aura, accompanied with a strange burst of light. I crashed to the ground, my whole body stinging. I bit my lip hard, forcing a cry back in.

"I pity you, human. To be the last of your kind, a lone wolf in Ooo. Too bad evolution took care of the rest of your kind years ago." I sat up, my side screaming with pain and my right arm limp. "You don't know…. anything..." I managed to say. He sneered, and a dark presence invaded my mind, his voice now both in my head and my ears.

"But I do! I could tell you how your species fought to survive, how they killed themselves over a little machine….how they all died off like little _cockroaches_… but I guess I shall be going now. I want my son to wake in perfect health, if you know what I mean…" A rumbling, and then the ceiling was ripped away, revealing an orange figure_. Jake!_

***Jake***

Oh glob, I hoped my bro was okay. I had already taken the doc over to the rest of the candy people at the refuge by the edge of the kingdom, and told them that this was all a special firework display, but unfortunately it made it LOOK like their houses had burned down. I chuckled. Candy people are so gullible. At least there weren't going to be any more gut explosions, that was just _nasty_. What was I gonna do again…oh yeah! Find Finn. I was approaching the castle when I heard a crash in the turret. _What's goin on up there? _ I became huge Jake and lifted off the little triangle ceiling. And then I saw the Lich laughing and my bro curled up on the floor. My eyes widened. _WHAT THE-?!_ "FINN!" I yelled out. I was suddenly zapped by some black lightning, thus shrinking back to my original size and crashing down next to Finn. I moaned.

***Finn***

"Jake!"I meant to shout but it only came out in a choke. Jake turned over to face me and winked groggily. He closed his eyes and stuck out his tongue, pretending he was dead. At least I hoped that's what he was doing….

"I was _wondering _if your dog companion was going to come… Well, off to collect more snacks…er…princesses." The Lich said. I could scarcely see him popping that weird bubble around Princess Bubblegum and throwing her over his shoulder. She was still knocked out. I reached out a shaking arm, "Prin…cess…" I groaned. The Lich flew off, opened a portal, and disappeared. Jake held out a hand, although he hadn't stood up either. "Come on dude." I groaned again. I felt like I was gonna split in half. I touched my side and looked to my hand, my vision blurry, but good enough to see what color it was. I smiled, sleepiness ready to take me. _Red_. What has to do with red? *_Apples. Strawberries….and __**Marceline**_**…** Jake gasped. My last thoughts were_,_

_I failed._

_I'M a failure. _

_I'm not a hero._

And then darkness.


	4. Author's Note

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: PLZ READ :)**

Hehe. You thought it was a chapter. Nah, but I'll try to make this as short as I possibly can.

_SO_….. "Thank You"…. Any _other_ Finnceline fans ALSO disturbed Finn is still wearing Bonnibel's sweater? :P and I was also a LITTLE disturbed when Finn kissed Ice King on the cheek. I was like, _wha…? _But I guess it was kind of…uh….sweet? Eh, whatever. **SO HAPPY THANKSGIVING! (yeah i know it was yesterday but still)** I don't even know why we celebrate it, I just know that it has something to do with Native Americans and pilgrims and turkey and food and thanking people. So I guess I'll make a short thank you list:

Life (since even_ if_ reincarnation is possible we won't remember anything),

Family,

Jerky/ Non-jerky friends (cause even if some are jerky they almost always say just kidding. Either that or they TRY to be non-jerky. *I'm talkin to _you,_ "girl you never knew" :P*),

Oxygen (which without we'd all die),

And the rest of the earth elements,

Adventure Time (I think we all know the reason for that),

Starbucks (which without I'd never be able to post any of this 8D),

And other basic living necessities I am lazy to write since I promised to make this short.

**Here's a little preview of next chapter, then, (so it'll still be considered a sorta chapter), enjoy and stuffs. (it's not the beginning, by the way)**

I was lying on my side when a sudden burst of freezing air woke me up. Some jerk-wad had ripped off my blanket. _What the hey-hey?_ I opened my eyes but still stayed in the same spot, hoping it was just the wind so I could get back to my nap time.

"Finn?" a lady-like voice asks. _Marceline?! _I scrambled up from my sleeping position and rubbed my eyes. Marceline was floating by the side of the candy bed licking some left-over red stuff from her lips. _I really hope that's not blood….._ " Marceline, what the heck are you doing here?" I asked, still half asleep. She raised an eyebrow.

"What the heck are_–you_doing here? I thought justice never slept… " she replied with a smirk.

I crossed my arms. "Justice DOESN'T sleep." She floats over to the end of the bed where the light is and crossed her legs.

"Okaaay….then why are you here? It's not every day you see such a _righteous_ hero sleeping in a hospital bed made outta candy…." Marceline said sarcastically, glancing up.

_What WAS I doing here?_ I barely noticed that it was like my mind had all these fuzzy parts, but the only image that came right to my mind was my hand covered in my own blood…and the Candy Kingdom, yeah! But then…..._pain_. Gah, did someone want me to forget this on _purpose_? I see the blanket sliding to the ground and quickly grab it before it falls. As I do, my finger falls over a weird stitch in it and I raised it close to my face to get a better look on what it says.

"_For PB." _

And then it hits me: The Candy Kingdom on fire, the high-pitched screams, The Lich, PB beingkidnapped_, _and then his talk about my peeps that had made me_ so_ filled with rage_…_ all this had really _happened_, and here I was, resting it up, while some wrong-teous thing was happening with the princesses all over Ooo. Was he even serious when he said he was going to have a son? _Phbbt, _ well I couldn't really go find him, cause I had no clue where the math the Lich went, much less a plan on how to get the princess back. _What am I gonna DO?_ I found myself wishing I hadn't woken up, wishing someone _else _could do this for once, even though I'm the only one who possibly can, but…. Now….now I wasn't worthy of being called a hero anymore.


	5. Midnight Snacks

**Chapter 4**

_THUMP…...THUMP…..THUMP….__**THUMP!**_

I sat up quickly reacting to the really loud sound, panting and staring into grayness. _Where the heck am I?!_ I looked and patted around me, and it looked like I was in a hospital bed, a light fuzzy blanket, reaching up to half my legs, and a fluffy pillow. _Aw, not again! Last time I was out for six months!_ I could barely tell that it's the same room where all the candy people were when Ice King got 'em sick with his weird beard flakes. I sighed loudly and threw myself back on the pillow. _Crup,_ _I'm really out of my element… _I lifted up my arms and legs where I could see them. *_Hmm...Everything LOOKS okay…I just hope*- _I touched my side, noticing I had some sort of rough bandage wrapped around my waist, and winced. It hurt like bells. It looked pretty dark, so I guess it was night. The only source of light in this place was the moon, but what ducked was that I was on the other side of the window, so the only light near me was at the foot of the bed.

_THUMP!_

"Hehe….…stop it Lady…"

I turned my body to the right, propping myself on my elbow, and looked down where the muttering was coming from. Jake was taking up two chairs, his head on one and the rest of him on the other, sleeping, and hugging his blankie to his chest. He kept leaning forward, almost falling, and then leaning back quickly and muttering stuffs in his sleep.

"Hehe…let's go before the farmer catches us…"

I smiled. Whatever the math he was dreaming about, at least he's happy. I leaned back and brought the blanket to my neck, digging the softness of it. _Like a frickin cloud... _I glanced over to the window; it was a pretty calm night. _Well, at least there's no poo brain horse to distract me from…_ _slee_….*My thoughts were stopped by a sudden heaviness in my eyelids. _No, Finn,_ I told myself, re_member justice….doesn't_….. I closed my eyes, ….._don't do it man!_... _aw ,dingle….…_and give in to sleep…

_**Marceline***_

Hmmm...Bonnie's GOT to have some red candy_ somewhere_… I licked my lips in anticipation. I held the lit candle out in front of me to see the shelves, but close enough I can feel its warmth. I had already ran out of red junk in my house, having sucked out all my red furniture and most of my crimson boots, but now I had a craving….…for…**BLOOD**_. _ I squished up my cheeks with my free hand. _Urgh, calm down, Marcy,_ I thought_, you've been able to hold back this urge before, you can do it again…_ Out of desperation, I had gone to my old house for some snacks, (Finn and Jake's tree fort now, I guess) but the only thing close enough to red was roast beef. And I was NOT gonna eat something that wasn't pure red. Then I tried the Lumpy Dimension but all I found was a PMS LSP with nothin to wear to the stupid promcoming dance. Blitch….

I hissed in frustration. I risk coming to the lovey dovey Candy Kingdom and there's nothing here?! Well it wasn't THAT lovey dovey, now it just looked like a half burned wax museum. Huh. Looks like Bonnie needs to tidy up her little "domain"…. But that didn't matter now. I had already tried the kitchen, the butler's room, Bonnie's room, and now I was searching the pantry upstairs, all decorated with pink and white. It's like there was everything BUT red candy. I dropped the candle to the floor and stamped on it with my red boot, deciding to rely on my risky but useful extrasensory vampire skillz to find something red. _I'm just hoping it doesn't lead me to blood_, I thought, _because then… _I shook my head, deciding not to think about it further. I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath, and reach a mental hand far back in the depths of my mind. I imagined up a switch activating meh powers (seems like the easiest way to do this without giving me a flipping headache…) and pulled it downwards.

I was suddenly aware of everything in the castle, like a giant universal blueprint behind my eyes: the weird lemon plotting his revenge underneath the castle, the Worm King hiding underneath Bonnie's bed, the secret stash of rock CD's under the floor planks (Ha! I'm not surprised…), even the peephole in Bubblegum's room made by the Peppermint (Might I mention the only one she'll ever get?). But what really caught my eye was a cherry lollipop underneath one of the hospital beds in the lower right level.

I bolted out of the pantry, leaving a mess of candy on the floor (hey, I'm not pickin _that_ up..). My black hair waved around me, covering my eyes as I fly down the stairs. Whatever. I'm using both of my sights anyway. In a flash, I was in the big hospital room, and I dashed under the bed ,groping for the candy. My hand clings to something sticky and I take it out. _Heck yeah! _I bring the candy to my mouth_, _closed my eyes and sucked in the luscious red color. _Mmmmm_…

Yeah, the whole "tracking red" thing comes with the vampire package, like an auto-pilot mode. Sure, it's pretty cool, but… if you're a newbie vampire sometimes you go out of control. You might go on a killing spree, and even _I_ have trouble pushing the urge down.

I open up my eyes again, but some sort of lump with a weird shaped head is lying on the bed. _What the…? _I squinted my eyes and floated over to get a better look and quickly removed the blanket. Even though he was lying on his side and it was around one in the morning, I'd know that light colored cute animal hat anywhere.

"Finn?"

_**Finn***_

I was lying on my side when a sudden burst of freezing air woke me up. Some jerk-wad had ripped off my blanket. _What the hey-hey?_ I opened my eyes but still stayed in the same spot, hoping it was just the wind so I could get back to my nap time.

"Finn?" a lady-like voice asks. _Marceline?! _I scrambled up from my sleeping position and rubbed my eyes Marceline was floating by the side of the candy bed licking some left-over red stuff from her lips. _I really hope that's not blood….._ "Marceline, what the heck are you doing here?" I asked, still half asleep. She raised an eyebrow.

"What the heck are _you_doing here? I thought justice never slept… "

"Justice DOESN'T sleep."

She floats over to the end of the bed where the ray of light is and crossed her legs. "Okaaay….then why are you here? It's not every day you see such a _righteous _hero sleeping in a hospital bed made outta candy…." Marceline said sarcastically, glancing up.

_What WAS I doing here?_ I barely noticed that it was like my mind had all these fuzzy parts, but the only image that came right to my mind was my hand covered in my own blood…and the Candy Kingdom, yeah! But then…..._pain_. Gah, did someone want me to forget this on _purpose_? I see the blanket sliding to the ground and quickly grab it before it falls. As I do, my finger falls over a weird stitch in it and I raised it close to my face to get a better look on what it says.

"_For PB." _

And then it hits me: The Candy Kingdom on fire, the high-pitched screams, The Lich, PB beingkidnapped_, _and then his talk about my peeps that had made me_ so_ filled with rage_…_ all this had really _happened_, and here I was, resting it up, while some wrong-teous thing was happening with the princesses all over Ooo. Was he even serious when he said he was going to have a son? _Phbbt, _ well I couldn't really go find him, cause I had no clue where the math the Lich went, much less a plan on how to get the princess back. _What am I gonna DO?_ I found myself wishing I hadn't woken up, wishing someone _else _could do this for once, even though I'm the only one who possibly can, but…. Now….now I wasn't worthy of being called a hero anymore.

"What might you be thinking about, Finny?" Marceline asks with a hint of amusement.

"Nothing important." I muttered, even though that's as true as Jake being an awesome chef. _It's already MY burden of being dumb, why should I make someone ELSE worry? _I thought._ But….she's a radical dame, she'll understand* _I twisted the fabric on the blanket. _Naw, she's a radical dame who likes to __**play games,**__ she wouldn't take it seriously….._. Suddenly she floats over to me and lightly takes my hand, her cold hand clashing with the warmth of mine, and looks straight at me, her black eyes almost hypnotizing in contrast to her skin.

"Finn do you really think I'm stupid enough not to notice you're in a HOSPITAL bed? I mean, you look all depressed and stuff and you've got bandages all over your body." She pointed her free hand to what I now notice is the melted and droopy exit leading out of the hospital _._ "Plus the fact that this place looks like a wax museum in the summer. I mean, I couldn't care less what Bonnie does with this place, but WHAT. IS. GOING. ON? " I take in a deep breath, noticing this weird, non teasing side of Marcy, before exploding with all the deets. _She's the only one who CAN understand_, I told myself.

" So the Princess sends a note to come to the Candy Kingdom and when me and Jake get there it was completely covered with some kind of magic fire, and all the Candy peeps were screaming all over the place," I explain, each memory (unfortunately) becoming clearer as I say it. " PB was up on the balcony fighting something off, and when I come up to see what the math's goin on with her, the Lich was just _there_ finishing whatever and then jacked up my side with his magic and I don't even know how long I've _been_ here, while he escaped with Bubblegum to who knows _where._ And probably as we speak he's collecting princesses as food for his totally sick _son." _I looked down and tugged at my awesome hat's ears anxiously, wanting to somehow rip my hair off. "I don't deserve to be called a hero…." I admitted with a sigh.

Marceline suddenly lets go of my hand, her face momentarily in shock. "The Lich….?!" she whispered angrily, floating back a bit and looking down. She quickly wiped the surprise off her face and looked at me.

"Dude, you're just one person, you have to realize you're not always going to rescue Princess whatevers for the rest of your life…."

I sighed again. "I know, but.. what are we gonna do about the Lich?" I asked.

"Hmm… Meet up at my house tomorrow. I think I know what to do…" she replies, seemingly bored, contrary to what her reaction was when I said the Lich came back. _What was up with that… _But then a more important detail came to my mind.

"What's gonna happen to all those 'napped princesses in the meantime? Are we just gonna leave them for dead?!" I asked, the righteous part of me really disturbed.

"I dunno…maybe we _will_…" she answered, smiling sticking out her snake tongue. I feel my mouth open in a tiny 'O' and I quickly close it. She laughs almost hysterically.

"Seriously, you're always so gullible. But just trust me. I've got a plan, if you _really_ want to save all those prissy princesses…." She began to float away, but then stops and turns back and kissed my cheek, right at the corner of my mouth. _Whaa..?_ "Hope ya get better, Finny." Marceline says, her face obscured by her hair. She lightly threw the candy at me and flies out the window with a _SWOOSH._ I unconsciously smile and look down at the almost ghostly lollipop .Oh. So it was this lollipop she was eating. I mean drinking. _Huh. I wonder what it would taste like… _I bring it to my mouth and lick it slowly. _Tastes like….rocks. Or maybe…candied dirt?_ I look over to the right and see Marce hanging upside down outside the dark window watching me, her eyebrows raised and a smile showing one of her fangs. I quickly make the motion to hide it behind my back but it sticks to my tongue. _OW!_ "Uh… ah wath wondin wha ih…. tasthes lie…?" I managed to say, one hand grabbing the handle and the other pointing to my mouth. She laughs, a momentary echo throughout the room, and floats into the night.

I gently pried the candy away from my mouth and study it. _Should I keep this?_ I glance over to Jake, imagining what my bro would say. "_Naw, it's just trash, Finn! Besides, she creeps me the math out…" _I looked back to the white candy in the palm of my hand_. Well, I can't really keep it, it's just gonna get all jacked up…. _I half-heartedly threw it to the floor and closed my eyes…

_**Lich* **_

I never knew the breeze could be so….._refreshing ._I was flying over the plains of Ooo, andI had just finished collecting a set of princesses for my future son, as Bonnibel wasn't talking anymore. It had almost made me _sad_. No screams…. no pleads…. no quiet sobs…..just silence now. No matter. The next batch will weep all the more, and I had already put them all in my dimensional pocket sack.

I reached into my cloak and took out the eye from the giant troll I had killed moments ago, deciding to check up on the wretched human, although I doubted he had mustered enough strength to be able to walk again, much less remember. I was sure I took away a portion of his memory, as well as physically damaged him. Well, better safe than sorry, as insolent mortals say.

Oh, how this lifeless eye _glistened_ in the moonlight! I almost felt sorry for that beast, how his wife, family members, whoever it may be would cry over its unreturn. But every creature, whether terrifyingly evil or not, has to eat, and his life essence was particularly… _scrumptious._ I placed my hand over the eye and charged it with dark magic, the black and green sparks gradually and satisfactorily oozing from my fingers._**Scry**_…. The eye glowed and a picture slowly faded into the pupil of the eyeball. The human boy was sitting on a hospital bed, apparently conversing with the vampire girl in the dark. I grinned. Figures the weakling couldn't recover soon enough. The vampire soon floats out of the picture, leaving the human to ponder by himself. What's this? Licking a lollipop, is he? Ha! He'll never stand a chance. Of course…. he never did. I wave my hand once more over the eye, and the picture fades away.

Let the boy rest up.

I want him healthy for when I destroy him.

**BLEEPS! A month and a half…. :L **** I blame fundamental schools and their….standards… and..ugh. (you know what I mean…)**

**I'm generally not a person who specializes in *cue Jake's voice * "**_**romance"**_**, so I hope it's decent enough** **And if it's not…meh…it's not my full potential, but I tried. :l**

**thanks for reading, peeps! And don't forget to review! :)**

**Marceline: "Finn, you're like an ant to him…." **

**Finn: "oh yeah? Well this ant's about to get in his ****pants!**


End file.
